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How to manage bad thoughts during a crash...

alex3619

Senior Member
Messages
13,810
Location
Logan, Queensland, Australia
Don't think of a white square. Don't think of a red triangle. Don't think of a pink elephant.

Ask a healthy person these and they will have big trouble not thinking of these things. I don't think that psychologists have figured out yet that an ME patient is so slow to process stuff that we might realize we don't want to think of it before we actually do, and stop.

Yet the advice given in psychology is I think good on this point. You can't not think of things in general. What you do is think of other things. Its about creating a different focus.

Yet in crashes I think many of our concerns are entirely appropriate and genuine. Its normal, not abnormal, its the circumstances that are abnormal, and so we respond in ways that most people don't.

Finding something else to focus on, some small thing you can still think of, or think about, or get involved in, is probably a good thing. It might be something as simple as watching a snail. There was a book about that. It might be something uniquely important to you. It might be keeping a journal of your experiences, writing it all down. What it might be or not be would be based upon who you are and how sick you are. If you can find that something then you have half the battle won.

When I was in hospital and too fubar to even move, I was thinking about things that are important to me ... which in my case is advocacy related usually. You don't even have to be able to write stuff down, if you can think you can shift focus. A variant of this idea would be to learn some style of meditation that works when you are in a crash.

During really bad crashes we entirely lose the capacity to think. This is worse but easier to cope with, because we are zombies, and zombies don't think. Its during improvement, or on the way down, or in slightly less serious crashes that these issues arise. They arise for all of us.
 

cmt12

Senior Member
Messages
166
I have a lava lamp to stare at, its easier than thinking sometimes and better than the ceiling
Yeah I've found the best thing to do is to try to engage in something visually. I just try to watch t.v. to get through it. You won't be able to just turn it off when you're in that negative emotional state, so you just have to try to wait it out without making yourself worse by engaging in the negative thoughts - causing you to feel worse, which causes more negative thoughts, etc. It will become a downward spiral if you allow yourself to get sucked into it. It's hard but just do the best you can. It will pass.
 
Messages
1,082
Location
UK
Hahaha ive just found a way to make our invisible illness less invisible (even if it is thanks to the migraine not the ME) managed to crawl onto the window ledge as soon as the suns gone down so its almost dark. Stuck my head out of the window to pretend i'm outside and then; projectile vomitted out of the window without warning (I'm a few floors up)

Thankfully it isnt too offensive as ive only had liquids the last couple of days but enough to amuse me. Hope any of the neighbours werent looking out of the window at the time or i may be not the only one with bad thoughts :) its good to share :)
 

Gingergrrl

Senior Member
Messages
16,171
@SDSue, You already know how much I support and respect you (so I won't repeat it all here!) but hope that you are getting lots of rest and taking today one minute at a time. Sending lots of hugs and prayers your way :hug:
 

CFS_for_19_years

Hoarder of biscuits
Messages
2,396
Location
USA
Try to find something that will take your mind off of your problems. When my energy is at its lowest, I know I can still look at my Facebook feed. I've subscribed to Facebook cat sites, joke sites, pretty shabby chic sites, some news sites, lots of nature sites. The pretty pictures will take your breath away. One of my favorites is Most Awesome Web Photos. I think I stole my avatar from a Facebook post, can't remember for sure though!

If Facebook isn't your thing, try light reading materials such as magazines or "easy to read" books that aren't too taxing. TV can be hit or miss. I've found myself enjoying older shows like The Outer Limits or Alfred Hitchcock just because they are so cheesy.

Crashes were easier to bear while I still had cats around me. Trying to interact with people during a crash is too taxing.
 
Messages
41
Location
California
Crashes were easier to bear while I still had cats around me. Trying to interact with people during a crash is too taxing.
My illness has made me realize how complex our interactions with other people can be. I also find it taxing to interact with people when I crash out. I find solace with my pets, although caring for them requires more energy that I would like. I had one sweet cat that lived to 18 years old that I miss dearly. He seemed to know when I was out of sorts and would lay next to my head and purr. That kept me in the moment, which really helped.

It's so interesting to hear all your various techniques for dealing with this. It's always to good to remember that other people have gone down the same path. We are just too tired to communicate with each other sometimes!
 

belize44

Senior Member
Messages
1,662
I talk to myself as if I were a little girl, asking myself what I would like to do. There have been days when I was stuck in bed all day, for up to five days at a time. I offer myself choices, depending upon how much brain fog there is. If it is severe, then there is truly nothing that I can do but rest and try not to dwell on how miserable I feel. If I am up for it, I take the laptop to bed and play games there. If I am alert enough, I watch movies on Netflix or read. The worst days are when I cannot read or write in my journal, because writing has saved my sanity more than once. I think the most important thing any of us can do is to be kind to ourselves in our thoughts.